Who's the best?

At the moment, I am studying a Bachelor of Performing Arts at Monash University. Generally this means I don't have any exams, get marked on performances where I imitate a testical and do slow motion exercises involving me moving from one chair to another in 15 minutes. Also in this course, part of our requirements is to attend performances outside of class. Now I take lazy to the epic level and for me to actually do something out of class is a huge pain the arse so when we were told that we must go to at least two performances, I was less than enthused. That was until the first performance began.

I was lucky enough to go to see "Who's the best?" at the Arts House Meat Markets performed by an hilarious trio from Sydney. These talented people are Zoe Coombs Marr, Mish Grigor and Natalie Rose (with Eden Falk). The performance was based around a competition between the three of them with the final outcome being attaining the knowledge of who is in fact the best. The criteria of this contest is broken down into categories such as looks, personality and special skills which are then broken down into sub categories and then further into sub sub categories. It got me to thinking, how would you decide who is the best? What makes someone THE BEST?! What percentage does each category recieve? And has a person's status changed with newer thinking and technology such as social networking sites?

I wonder, does your amount of friends on facebook or number of followers on twitter become a measure of your worthyness? Or does it mean your mental health suffers as a result of a constant obsession with how many likes your recent status update recieves?

How much emphasis is put on a person's looks? In the modelling world, it doesn't matter if you have a PHD in medical science or are the head of PETA. If you're not a size 8 or below, above 5'8" and have everything perfectly sound, you're not going to get anywhere. I was once told "don't wear those bathers to castings. I know they represent your personality but there is no time for that in this industry". Ridiculous? Yeah it is. Would this mean that in different social circles, more emphasis would be put on categories that involve a person's outward appearance rather than other personal traits?

How important is it really to be a super brain either? Some of the nicest and most indearing people I know have been called stupid by at least one other person. Who cares if they can't recite the periodic table off by heart? Does that make them a bad person because they don't retain the knowledge that some others do? Why should that make them inferior? Some people think I'm stupid sometimes when they first meet me because I have a SUPER high pitched voice and am overly enthusiastic all the time. I've come to realise that if someone will judge you that quickly then you probably don't want to be friends with them anyway. Isn't it much more important to treat people with kindness and integrity?

I feel as though "goodness" should be a category. Like people who give to that hobo singing "I will survive" on a streetcorner or who take the time out of their day to listen to other people's problems rather than obsess over their own. People have their own opinions on what is considered "good" in a person. Examples of that include vegetarians who don't eat meat as they do not approve of the way in which animals are killed. That's all fine and I accept that but don't go around wearing suede boots, a leather jacket and a fur vest while preaching to me that humans weren't born to eat meat and that I should stop because I'm harming the environment. If you don't wear animal skins and furs or have them in your home, fine, but don't tell me to stop eating my delicious juicy steak when you're cosy in your furs!

I like a good skill. I WILL be impressed if you can tie a cherry stem in a knot with your tongue, can play guitar like Santana or can do flips in the air. To me, that makes a person that much cooler. I'm very easily impressed as well and I love a good joke. I also like food in large quantities so if someone can cook for me then I will love them forever.

The last but not least category that I will care to mention is personality. People who don't speak are dreary and ruin my day. It is also hugely frustrating when someone finds only one thing in common with you and is to lazy to find out anything else about you so they only ever speak to you about the one topic. GET A PERSONALITY! It will pay off, I guaruntee it or your money back.